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LINCICOME: Nuggets' new approach is laughable

By Bernie Lincicome, Rocky Mountain News (Contact)

Published September 30, 2008 at 3:57 p.m.

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Let's say the Nuggets deserve the benefit of the doubt, rather than the doubt itself, and there is much more doubt than benefit.

Let's say that this Nuggets team is going to be hard-nosed, rather than nose in the air, that this team is going to knock people about just to make a point.

Let's say that the two most incompatible ingredients since bleach and ammonia are not in fact toxic but, rather, that Allen Iverson and Carmelo Anthony are honey and cinnamon, blending and mingling into one sweet potion.

Let's say that Kenyon Martin is Iron Man and that Nene is Resurrection Man, and that they are both more durable than the comic book paper they are printed on.

Let's say that George Karl is using both eyes when he looks at this team and sees a better bunch than any time since he's been here, a team that pays attention and carries out orders.

Let's say that Anthony is not bone tired from his real job, playing for Team USA, where he is admired and is first or second among equals.

Let's say that Anthony will not only play defense but understand that playing defense is not something extra like airline miles, and let's say that he will not pout about it later when no one says, "Nice defense, Melo."

Let's say that Marcus Camby and Eduardo Najera were no more important to the Nuggets than an extra pair of socks and that the Nuggets will be as glad to be rid of them as they would a head cold.

Let's say that whoever is replacing them will lead the league in blocked shots, rebounds, floor burns and energy.

Let's say that saving money by letting Camby and Najera go is not the real reason the Nuggets are in business, and let's say that there is no front-office clerk with an adding machine and a spreadsheet turning in game reports on points per penny.

Let's say that the only luxury tax owner Stan Kroenke is worried about is the tariff on championship jewelry.

Let's say that the new spirit detected by Karl in this Nuggets team is not just a change of cologne.

Let's say that the three-point line is a pet and not an in-law, a friend and not a mugger, a pal and not an enemy, a sweetheart and not an ex. In short, let's say the three-point line treats the Nuggets as if it likes them.

Let's say that any rumors of Iverson being traded are not started by Iverson.

Let's say Iverson passes the ball and does not demand it back. Let's say that Iverson sacrifices some of his scoring for more collaboration. Let's say Iverson leads instead of shows off.

Let's say, in fact, that Iverson leads the league in assists, makes every other player on the Nuggets better and changes his nickname from A.I. to A.We.

Let's say that the Nuggets' shot selection is based on tactics and design rather than on J.R. Smith having the ball in his hands.

Let's say that the next time Anthony accuses the team and the coach of quitting that he produces his own time card first.

Let's say the Nuggets are not too small to play big or too thin to play the fourth quarter.

Let's say that the first time Karl pulls a star from the game for lack of effort or to reinforce his get-tough policy, the star sits down meekly, does not glare and does not later tell the press that it's either him or the coach.

Let's say that the bigger hammer Karl is promising to use is not one of those foam mallets with which clowns bang each other around at the circus.

Let's say that the Nuggets have a point guard.

Let's say that predictions that the Nuggets are a team in retreat are being made by someone who gave the points.

Let's say that the Nuggets respond to skepticism about their chances by proving it wrong.

Let's say that between the end of October and the middle of April, every moment will matter with the Nuggets, and with any NBA team for that matter.

Let's say the NBA season is not so much calisthenics and let's say that what really matters are how many games are won, how many points are scored and how many home courts are clinched. Let's say the playoffs do not really matter.

Let's say all of this and try not to laugh.

Comments

  • September 30, 2008

    5:31 p.m.

    Suggest removal

    tabs2020 writes:

    You are very positive...congratulations.

    You and others like you act as if this team won 10 games, not 50.
    Must be great to get paid for being a jerk.

  • September 30, 2008

    10:18 p.m.

    Suggest removal

    GOPteacher writes:

    No kidding. Mr. Positive. I'll bet with his sweet disposition, he gets offers from the DMV every day.

    I'm so eager for the Nuggets that I actually read most of an article by Bernie Lincicome.

    We're all disappointed in the playoff results, but it sounds like Bernie would be happier with 17-65.

    I'll remember to pass by Bernie's next offering.

  • October 1, 2008

    7:01 a.m.

    Suggest removal

    kmeissner writes:

    This guy is a hack. I got through about 1/3 of this article. If you can't write anything positive about the team at all, why are you even in Denver? They won 50 games last year. Yeah the playoff exits in the first round are getting old, but we're not Minnesota or Miami. We're competitive every year and entertaining to watch. If you don't like our team, I'm sure you can get a job in ANOTHER CITY YOU IDIOT! Now I'm just waiting for an article from you about how bad the Broncos are and how they have no hope either.

  • October 1, 2008

    8:07 a.m.

    Suggest removal

    jeremynix writes:

    Let's say that Bernie actually knows what he is talking about, and is drawing from years of experience with the NBA.
    Let's say that Mr. Lincicome is a talented writer, and offers us entertaining, informative sports columns that are actually worth taking a look at.
    Let's say that his negative slant only happens every once in a while, and that he never just jumps on the bandwagon when Denver's sports franchises are doing well.
    Let's say all this, and try not to PUKE.
    YOU STINK LINCICOME.

  • October 1, 2008

    8:32 a.m.

    Suggest removal

    Hutch writes:

    Give Bernie a break. He did, after all, pick the Avs to beat the Wings in 6 last spring.

    He's tired and bitter, but he is drawing a paycheck by working something on the order of five hours per week, which means he's figured out a life secret that I can't crack.

  • October 1, 2008

    9:07 a.m.

    Suggest removal

    chillywilly writes:

    This was just completely terrible journalism. Why dump on these guys even before the ball has even been dribbled yet!? Whats the point!? I mean how many holes can be in one article!? AI and Melo actually have played great together offensively. None of the two lack in this department. On Defense they weren't very good last year. Thats about it.

  • October 1, 2008

    10:13 a.m.

    Suggest removal

    italiantony writes:

    good point there chillywilly, they both played well enough, on the same team, to be starters on the all-star team last year.

  • October 1, 2008

    11 a.m.

    Suggest removal

    joered writes:

    according to 'get attention without substance bernie', why should the nuggets bother to play at all? he seems to say the nuggets should quit before the season starts. he might try the same approach with his next column: 'it's going to be bad, so why write it.'

  • October 1, 2008

    11:53 a.m.

    Suggest removal

    wj_nugs writes:

    I am excited for the real season to begin. The negativity and skepticism are no surprises, especially from the "beat" writers in this city.
    I would like to read this guys response when the D-Nugs start turning some heads around the league...in a POSITIVE way.

  • October 1, 2008

    12:07 p.m.

    Suggest removal

    ramAZ writes:

    Let's say we give them more than one day of training camp before we throw the team under the bus and declare defeat.

    This is still a YOUNG team and YOUNG teams tend to improve with more experience.

    Will the Nuggets contend? The have a lot of IF's. Guess what... every team has question marks going into the season.

    The Suns focus on defense and conditioning in Day 1 of training camp and the Phoenix media calls it refreshing and encouraging.

    The Nuggets do the same thing and Denver media dorks run the doom flag up the pole.

    Let's at least wait until we see them on the court to jump to conclusions.

  • October 1, 2008

    12:10 p.m.

    Suggest removal

    DenverCOFan writes:

    Suggest removal

    jeremynix writes:
    Let's say that Bernie actually knows what he is talking about, and is drawing from years of experience with the NBA.
    Let's say that Mr. Lincicome is a talented writer, and offers us entertaining, informative sports columns that are actually worth taking a look at.
    Let's say that his negative slant only happens every once in a while, and that he never just jumps on the bandwagon when Denver's sports franchises are doing well.
    Let's say all this, and try not to PUKE.
    YOU STINK LINCICOME.

    This was hillarious!

    Thanks jeremynix! I needed a good laugh!

  • October 1, 2008

    12:54 p.m.

    Suggest removal

    denver15 writes:

    That was absolutely unreadable, couldn't get past six sentences.

    Let say Bernie drowns himself in a bucket tonight, would he be missed?

  • October 1, 2008

    6:07 p.m.

    Suggest removal

    TheSlinger writes:

    i just threw up a little. the nuggets are going to be riddled with injury and maybe squeak into the playoffs to get ran over like every other year. but i don't need bad news bernie to tell me that. fire karl! and bernie...

  • October 1, 2008

    8:53 p.m.

    Suggest removal

    Highcountry writes:

    Bad writing. Period.