FAMILY HELPLINE: Homework takes time, teaches self-discipline

By Beth Pfalmer, Special to the Rocky

Sunday, May 11, 2008

I worry about the demands that school places on my 9-year-old son. He has homework every day that takes more than an hour to finish. Why do teachers make it so hard for kids?

Doing the work of learning isn't always fun or even all that interesting. But your son has to do that work if he's to reach adulthood ready to take care of himself and get along with others.

You play a very important role in supporting your son as he gets his education. You provide the ongoing assurance that his schoolwork is very important. You help him develop the self-discipline to do the hard work of learning.

Make a place for him to do homework. Make certain he has the tools he needs and be available to coach him. Be positive that he can finish his work. Be encouraging when he's struggling.

Empathize when it's hard to follow through on his homework responsibility, but never give him the impression that he has too much work or that it's too hard. End the homework session with a few minutes of your undivided attention and praise for finishing his work.

My fourth-grade daughter is going to a tutor because she is having trouble reading. She doesn't want to go, and I'm not sure I should make her go. What do you think?

If kids were capable of making prudent decisions about their well-being, they wouldn't need parents. The decision about working with a tutor isn't your daughter's to make.

If your daughter isn't reading at grade level, she's at risk of falling behind in more subjects than reading. You are wise to intervene now rather than wait for her to fall further behind.

This is just one of many situations in which you will make decisions about what's best for your girl, even when it makes her mad.

Have a parenting question? Call the Family Support Line, 303-695-7996 or 1-877-695- 7996, 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. daily. The Family Support Line is a program of Families First, sponsored in part by the Rocky.