Changing perspective

Columbine journalist also a relative of Virginia Tech victim

Janet Simons, Rocky Mountain News

Friday, April 20, 2007

On April 20, 1999, Susan Geary was a television network field producer responsible for sending feeds of the events at Columbine High School out to the world.

In a strange way, she says, that experience helped prepare her to handle the horrible news she heard at 3 a.m. Tuesday: Her brother's daughter, Caitlin Hammaren, 19, had died in the gunfire at Virginia Tech.

Caitlin, a sophomore majoring in international studies and French, grew up in New York. Since Geary has spent most of her life in the West, the two weren't that close.

But Geary will be moving soon to Virginia, "and I was looking forward to seeing (Caitlin) again and talking to her about school."

Geary, who now lives in Prescott, Ariz., said that covering Columbine was "a life-changing event."

"Until now, that was the worst day of my life. But it was also one of the best because I found a strength in myself that I didn't know I had.

"All kinds of things went wrong that day - mechanical failures, electronic problems. But I didn't panic or have a meltdown. I held it all together, and our coverage ran smoothly. It showed me that if I trusted my gut, all things are possible."

Columbine was life-changing in another way. Geary became so weary of covering the aftermath of the shootings that she left journalism to start a résumé-writing business.

"A year later, we were still covering Columbine, and I knew every victim's story by heart. I also felt like I was becoming a pulpit for everyone who had a platform: pro crosses on the hill, anti crosses on the hill, pro gun control, -anti gun control.

"I re-examined what I wanted to do with my life, because I just didn't want to keep doing that."

Experiencing school shootings as both a journalist and a family member of a victim gives Geary a unique perspective.

She remembers hearing the pleas from family members to stop showing painful footage of Columbine students jumping out of windows or running from the school.

Now she wonders if the sound of gunshots recorded on cell phones will echo in her head forever.

"I've been watching television and cruising the Internet constantly," she said. "I hear the gunshots and see the cell-phone video over and over again, and it's pretty disturbing. I hadn't realized that would ever be me."

Geary recently sent cards to her clients to remind them to update their references. On each card she hand-wrote: "A résumé makes an excellent college graduation gift."

It was a gift she had planned to give her niece for graduation in June 2009.

"I was really looking forward to writing her résumé for graduation. She was such a great student and such a great kid. Those are the résumés you look forward to writing for people."

Geary is still processing a tragedy that nothing really could have prepared her for. But she has a preliminary plan to set up a résumé scholarship in Caitlin's name.

"I'd like set up a program in the field of international studies, which was Caitlin's field," Geary said. "I'll write a résumé for the top student each year, and that will help keep her memory alive.

"It will help me get through this, too."

simonsj@RockyMountainNews.com or 303-954-2547